LETTER: From a survivor, believe abuse accusations regardless of where they come from

Published 1:30 am Tuesday, November 21, 2017

I am watching with astonishment as accusations of sexual harassment come flooding out in the news — with actual, new credibility on the side of the accusers and real punishment on the side of the abusers. Is it that the time has finally come? Just like Women’s suffrage after centuries of marginalization, civil rights after decades of (and ongoing) hypocrisy and marriage equality after years of resistance, are women really finally being listened to?

Why didn’t these women come forward before, many ask. I am (just barely) a survivor of 13 years of serious domestic abuse. My beautiful, loving, supportive family had no clue because I was too embarrassed to tell them. My parents died never knowing. My accomplished daughter had a plum job at NASA that she landed after college, but endured sexual abuse from a man in upper management until, beaten down from unsympathetic human resources handling of the affair, she quit that job. To all of you out there on the fence, believe these women. During these 40-plus years after my marriage ended, I’ve been asked countless times (by those I cautiously confided in) “why didn’t you just tell someone or ask for help or just leave?” There are a million reasons why we don’t tell, don’t ask for help or don’t just leave … and the reasons are all painfully real.

— Nancy Sipple