The human net that holds us

Published 1:30 am Tuesday, July 28, 2026

I recently did something I wasn’t looking forward to: selling raffle tickets at Strawberry Festival to support Voice of Vashon (VOV), our local nonprofit radio station.

I love the station, its local programming and emergency alert services, and the many people who keep it alive. But hawking tickets — also known as facing possible rejection — is not my thing.

In the end, though, it was almost fun, because it reminded me how important it is to have a community.

We live in “the land of the free and the home of the brave,” a culture that often exalts individual achievement.But our praise of individual power needs to be balanced by communities that hold us together when things get tough.

Because nobody does it alone.

When I stopped by VOV to pick up my raffle tickets, I was reminded how much I like the people at our mostly volunteer-run station. Selling tickets was a team effort, which made the prospect easier to face.

I began my shift walking the streets with our “top hawker,” marveling at his ability to talk with almost anyone. Working together made the task easier, even after I veered off on my own.

Selling, in the abstract, frightens me, but talking to friendly people feels natural. I met people — some I knew, some I didn’t—who were in town to enjoy the fun. I loved the community vibe.

I ended my shift thinking: This is how we do hard things — by supporting one another and never doing them completely alone.

My little raffle challenge is insignificant compared with the hardships people and the planet face. But I take my lessons however they come. The same message applies when we face the truly tough stuff: we need each other.

We live in a world of social atomization. Sometimes community comes naturally. Other times we have to work at it.

When I moved to the island twenty years ago, I knew only a couple of people. I had no children in school, no local church, and no job to introduce me to colleagues. It would have been easy to enjoy this beautiful place without getting to know its people.

Fortunately, a neighbor invited me to join the Garden Club. From there, I became a Master Gardener. I took writing classes, tried improvisational theater, and volunteered at Vashon Center for the Arts.

After seeing people several times around town, they became part of my sense of community.Before there was an internet, there was a human net.

Logging on to the web is relatively easy. Building a human network takes care and nurturing. The internet has opened doors to a global community, but I still need cups of connection at our coffee and tea shops.

I want to look into my friends’ eyes and see their light, touch their hands, and catch the scent of their perfume. I want to smell coffee roasting while machines grind the beans.

I need physical connection to balance my virtual connections.

The truth, for me, is that doing everything alone is too hard. It simply doesn’t work.

Many of my creative pursuits — writing, sketching and painting — require time alone. Yet I rarely feel alone because I have consciously connected with friends and others who share my passions.

I may work by myself, but I do not work in isolation.

My husband’s support is critical, as is the encouragement of my art companions. My garden helper saves the day when the weeds are about to declare victory. My religious community supports my spiritual searching. My family ties me to my ancestors. And my friends throw me a lifeline when I begin to sink into self-doubt.

Most self-help books focus on what YOU plan to do as a powerful individual.

What goals are YOU going to achieve? How will YOU muster the willpower to succeed?

Rarely do they ask:

How are you going to develop the ecosystem in which you can thrive?

How will the support you receive from others—and the support you give them—be essential to your success, perhaps even your survival?

When I read the news, it is easy to believe that I live in a broken nation. But when I walk through town selling raffle tickets, I see life, happiness, and connection. I am reminded how many people enrich our community by volunteering, contributing, and showing up.

I trust that, by working together, we have what we need to pull through, no matter what is happening in national or global politics. We will not pull through as isolated individuals.

We can remain our authentic, free-spirited selves while weaving ourselves into communities where each person does their part and helps carry the others.

I have one more shift selling raffle tickets at Thriftway. I will take a deep breath, chant to myself, My community, and, hopefully, smile.

So, please be good to our raffle ticket-selling volunteers. It’s for a great cause. And know that if you approach me with a ticket supporting one of your community causes, I am now a sitting duck.

Sally Jean Fox is the host of Embracing the Muse on Voice of Vashon, a radio program about living a creative life on the island. She also writes a weekly Embracing the Muse newsletter on Substack. Find her at sallyfox.substack.com.